Tales from the other side of school- part 1

E. turns 5 this fall.  Not soon enough to start school but it is soon enough that some of her little friends are starting.  This means that the conversations are all about good schools, bad schools, charter schools, shifting lines, teachers, etc and how quickly 5 years have flown by.
It has made me start thinking about teaching and the whole education process again.  I have so many, many thoughts about this; hence the title.  I think there will be several blogs about it. I am not sure how to transition my thoughts into something smooth so I think the best approach is to hold my breath and dive right in.
Here goes. . .
There is nothing wrong, in my opinion, with the education system as is.  It is the same system that we have had for over a 100 years.  We have tried different "gimmicks" that all have slightly different names but are essentially the same- just read turn of the (last) century novels.  So what is the problem?
Again, my opinion is that it starts before the kids get to school. No, I don't think that we should start school sooner.  It starts with the parents.  COME ON PEOPLE!  There is a reason why Super Nanny is so popular.  Look, I am not saying that bad parents turn out bad kids or that good parents have good kids.  Sometimes, the horse won't drink when you lead it to water - clear or brackish.   But I am saying that we need to look beyond poor schools to the home life.
This is in no way saying that I have got it figured out or that I am going to win awards for parenting or that my kids won't have issues in school.  Case in point.  All 4 of us were playing Hungry Hungry Hippos.  Mom, Dad, 4 year old and 2 year old.  First time!  It was fun!  S. (2 year old) thought this was great!  Loud noises!  Little balls!  Being included!  Whoo hoo!  Then he decided that he would just scoop up the balls and shove them in the hippos mouth.  The parents thought this was hilarious!  Well, it got a laugh out of mom and dad, right?  So the 4 year old did it.  Now, if there is one thing her dad can't stand - it is cheating.   Poor E.  had to sit out a game and got a talking to.  Now, is it would I have done?  No, the concept of cheating is new so we would have explained it and then if it happened again, well, there would be consequences.
That is one example but I can't tell you the number of times I have lost it!  So my parenting isn't the best but there is something wrong with society when teachers need unions for the lawyers in order to protect themselves from parents who didn't like the verbal reprimand that the teacher gave the kid for throwing another kid up against the wall (and then walked him to the office for further punishment).  Yeah, like I really shook the kid who had a foot and 50 lbs on me!
That is just wrong.  There is something wrong here.  And it isn't just the schools that are at fault.

Homework

I called my dad to apologize today.  Usually, I call my mom but that is because I usually apologize for doing to her what my kids do to me.  Today, it was my dad.  You see, my dad is an engineer.  And other than my husband, is probably one of the smartest men I know (strangely, my brothers are in the top 10 of smartest men I know too.  hmmmm, to be explored later!).  So when we had a math or science question, we usually went to dad - after all, he is an engineer and graduated from Cornell.  As much as I love and admire my dad and as smart as he is, helping his kids with their math homework wasn't his forte.  He seemed to think that if we didn't get it the first time he explained it, it must have been because we weren't listening aka hadn't heard.  So his method of instruction was to repeat the same explanation but louder.  Now, imagine yourself as a 13 year old girl full of hormones, sitting at the kitchen table trying to understand what your dad is saying as he repeats it for the 4th or 5th time and his voice as risen to a roar until he finally gets up in frustration and leaves the room.
My poor dad.  He did try.  He just had no teaching strategies classes and couldn't seem to understand that it wasn't what he was saying but how that wasn't working.
So why the apology? As brilliant as my children are, at 2 and 4, they are not up to algebra but trying to recognize all the their numbers or get past 3.  I am tutoring an 8th grader in algebra (irony, I am an english teacher!).  I have the benefit of lots of teaching classes behind me so I know that roaring will not bring about enlightenment.  I know that there are different ways to say the same thing over and over - I cut out paper, used visual aids, etc.  At the end of the hour, I thought I saw a nightlight flick on in this 8th graders head.  Yeah!  Hope all goes well on the test tomorrow!
But I called my dad because I know how difficult grasping a concept like Pythagorean theorem is for that developmental stage and I know how much we tease him for his "strategies" that he used with all 4 of us.  He is good-natured about it and usually shakes his head.  We all passed, didn't we?
Still, it makes me think at how easily I look at the text book and grasp concepts that I struggled with so much.  Perhaps it is because I can grasp more complex concepts now.  My kids are struggling with the concepts of order and shapes representing numbers.  Someday, I will have to ask them to understand unknown numbers too!  But I think that we really do understand things better or more fully as we get older.  That is why I call to apologize to my mom for always telling her that the house looked great when she said it was a mess (never thought it was a mess but now I understand what she meant.  Don't worry, you will too if you haven't already.) and why I call my dad to apologize for not understanding the math.  You do the best you can as a parent. 

I am just glad that my parents are still helping me with my homework.